Sunday, September 26, 2010

More autumnal movies

You are so correct, my loverly five readers!  Add em on, girls:

The Nightmare Before Christmas.  Very conservative Christians and baptists probably don't watch this one...evidently I am on the edge of the flock as usual.  A good flick for Gianni to watch before bed, because Fern Gully is, in his words, 'too scary.'

The Ghost and Mr Chicken.  Come on, who doesn't LOVE Don Knotts?  If you can get past the whole murdered lady with scissors in her throat part (my girls can't) you'll find this a very fun movie indeed.

Beetlejuice.  Love the waiting room.

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.  Nothin' brings back childhood like Charlie!

Murder, He Says.  Sometimes (ok all the time) when my mom and little sis get together, a lot of movie quotes come out of our mouths.  And no one gets the references really.  So they just smile and nod.  But if you watch this movie, you too will have tons of one liners and you can join in our witty banter!  You know you want to!  And pass the grits with the gravy, would ya?

The Others.  When I wake up in the middle of the night cuz something went bump, this is the movie that starts playing in my head.  I squeeze my eyes shut and try not to think of creepy children.  It doesn't work, which is the sign of a really good scary movie.

The Blair Witch Project.  Sure, you all who saw it the week AFTER it was released and knew all the hype, you can go ahead and scoff.  Try going on opening night when you don't know what the heck you're seeing and see if you don't go home and sleep with a shotgun next to your bed.

The Changeling.  Remember the ball bouncing down the stairs?

The Sixth Sense.  I have a kindred spirit with Bruce Willis in this movie.  I have entire days too when no listens to a word I say or acknowledges my existence and I wonder if I too, am dead and don't realize it.  It would explain things.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Moose balancing my checkbook for me.  And looking cuter than a button in Mommy's glasses.

                        You can't see him very well, but this is the latest capture of the amphibian sort.

If you ask Moose what the frog's name is, here is what he'll tell you:

"His name is Me!"

Confused?  So were his parents.

"His name is Me?"
"NOO! His name is ME!"
"His name is You?"
"No, no, no! His name is MEEEEEE!"
"His name is Gianni?"
"Yes, dat's right!"

So Gianni (the frog) got carried around by Gianni (the boy) all day today.  Carried.  Shook.  Dropped.  Squeezed.  Loved.  Cuddled.  Kissed. 

Gianni (the boy) is almost ready for his first haircut.  I know, I know, almost three years old and he just now has enough hair to trim.  It's starting to curl in his ears.  But I'm afraid if I cut it, I'll regret it.  What if it makes him look older?  Ack! My hormones can't handle that.  I'm already having issues with not having a baby in the house anymore.  I'm secretly hoping my sister is pregnant with twins and she'll give me one (she's generous like that.  Why, just the other day she offered to mail me one of her already born ones!) 

Speaking of haircuts, I got my semi-annual one done this week.  Every hair stylist always says the same thing,
''s been a while, huh?'
Then they finger through my locks looking bemused.  
I have never liked my hair and whenever it's rebelliously curly I want it straight.  Whenever, for reasons unknown to me, it's straight, I wish for my curls.  Usually it's somewhere in between with a good dose of frizz thrown in to keep me humble.  I bought new hairspray today, guaranteed to weather even rain (get it? weather? HA!) and all sorts of evil humidity Michigan can dish out.  We'll see.  I won't hold out for miracles (Heidi Klum-ish) but I would prefer a step above Side Show Bob. 

In case you hadn't noticed, I changed the blog look again.  No more serial killer house...just a lovely orange to go with lovely autumn.  The trees here in Michigan I have to say, are out of this world.  I passed a purple tree the other day!  A purple tree!  I love, love, love it.  And I don't even like purple; it's my least favorite color.  But on trees?  Fantabulous.  Autumn rolls out a whole new list of annual movies for me: 

One True Thing.  This movie is one I've watched every year for several years with my best girlfriends.  We pop popcorn (which I don't eat, blech), sip tea or wine, braid each other's hair, and sob over Meryl Streep dying of cancer.  Every year I sob harder.  I can't help it, that woman is good.  And William Hurt is amazing in that movie. 

Hocus Pocus.  The girl's favorite Halloween movie. 

Arsenic and Old Lace.  Definitely in my top five favorite flicks ever.  I heart Cary Grant.  He is so funny in this, I never fail to crack up every year.  Even though it's an old black and white movie with no CGI or Disney channel pop princesses, my kids love this movie too.  It is hilariously funny and if you haven't seen it you really really should.

What are your favorite fall movies?

I refuse to believe no one else categorizes their movies according to seasons. 

Sunday, September 19, 2010

autumn daze

But, Mom, I don't need a nap!  See?  I'm wide awake!  I'm not tired! I'm - zzzzzzz...

The last of the summer garden cucumbers.

Well, the first couple weeks of school (juggling 5 public schoolers, two homeschoolers, and one Tasmanian devil who has discovered scissors) is under our belt.  We've already had our first back-to-school colds making the rounds, with Provolone down with it today.  I haven't been sick in a long while so I'm getting nervous...I might be due.  Anyone want to fill in for me if I come down with the Plague? Hello?  The days are going by incredibly fast.  Gone are the times with my hubs when we can sit down after a long day and watch something on the telly at night.  Too much homework.  I don't much care for most of this homework.  Shouldn't they be doing this in school?  I already spent several hours homeschooling, it confuses me as to why I have to spend two more each night.  It's becoming a soapbox with me.  And I'm not bashing teachers, I just didn't go to public school so all this is new to me.  If the students do all their actual "work" at home with their parents, or respective guardians, then what do they spend 8 hours a day doing in school?  But anyway.  It's a good thing I married one of those people who never forget things (except to bring home milk) because I am not good at this:

But if they need help with this, I'm their girl:

Although it's been a while and I would probably get stuck and have to be air lifted to the nearest hospital for back surgery/hip replacement.

Gianni is quite thrilled that his birthday is coming up.  I am not so thrilled.  What happened to that little pudgy ewok I gave birth to, like 10 minutes ago?  Where did he go?  Did this curly haired, dimpled toddler eat him?  There is no proof he ever existed.  I may need to curl up on the bathroom floor and weep for a while.

Carry on.

Ok (strangled sob) I'm better now.

He told me this morning that it was also MY birthday and that I could have a party and then he proceeded to sing the happy birthday song to me.  He also said I would be forty-forty.

Don't judge.  He's homeschooled.  Plus, he eats a lot of playdough.

He would like a tractor cake (surprise, surprise) and told his allergist all about it.  The doctor turned to me and said, 'He reminds me of my middle son.  The one I am always surprised is still living.'  I can only assume he said that because as he walked in the door, Gianni was airborne in the middle of a belly flop off the examining table.  He landed well and we gave him a 8.5.

The weather here is officially fall and I only have to go outside and breathe the lovely chilly air and take a walk to see all the trees turning to make my day seem calm and serene and perfect.  Ok, ok, some days it takes more than orange leaves to make everything serene, but for about a nano second there, the world stands still.  Then someone yells for me and someone else yells 'I found her' and then they drag me out from under the tree and force me to be a mother and responsible adult again.  I consider whining and stomping my feet and throwing myself prostrate on the grass, but they'll only demand more dinner and help with the iron and signatures on school papers and threats to drink all my coffee, so I finally give in and stomp back inside.  Must get better hiding places.  And bring dark chocolate.  And Cabernet Savignon.  

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Just More Things

1.  Gianni is walking around the house, moaning in sorrow, 'I need my belt!'

2.  Why would you need a belt, oh fruit of my looms, when you aren't wearing any pants?  Or underoos?

3.  Mike has a new coffee cup.  It's in the shape of Darth Vador's head.  So he walks around and says in his eerily accurate James Earl Jone's voice, 'You don't know the power of the dark roast!'

4.  I like canned mushrooms better than fresh.  Is that so wrong?

5.  I worry that it may be wrong.

6.  I love Sharpies even more than canned mushrooms.

7.  The other day Mike said the ceiling fan was turning in the wrong direction and so it was pushing all the hot air down.  Huuuuuh????  So he reversed it.  Whaaaaaaa???  I may have married the smartest man on planet earth.

8.  Though I still suspect he totally made that up.

9.  I am too qualified to homeschool my kids!  Now hush up, this is my blog.

10.  The first week of school is halfway over.  Whew.  I'm exhausted and I didn't even go with them.  All this public school nonsense is new to me.  I start to panic when my kids ask me things.  I don't know when you need permission slips!  I don't know if you get lunch!  I don't know if you can wear a cap!  Stop asking me all these questions!  What do I look like, your legal guardian and professional parent??? Oh, right.  Talk to James Earl Jones.  He's the smartest person EVAH.

11.  Teenages boys are JUST AS MOODY AS GIRLS.  I'm not sayin'...I'm just sayin'...Who am I kidding, I am REALLY sayin'.  Is it bad parenting to offer them a Midol?

12.  Mike is singing the National Anthem for several thousand people next week.  Cool, huh? 

13.  Two new introductions for ya:

The Teen Queen.  Age 15.  Volley ball player.

Hobbes.  Age 16.  Lone pale teen in a house full of Africans.

14.  If I could, I would color this blog with Sharpies for you and you too, would feel the warm fuzzies only a Sharpie can give you.

15.  I had a super long tiring day today and my ever so awesome female offspring watched their little moose of a brother for 6 hours (don't call the cops, I was only across the street, cleaning one of our other houses).

16.  When I got back Gianni wanted to show me how he 'fixes things,' which involves a plastic hammer and whatever his chubby hands can pretend to nail to his bedroom wall.  So I laid down on his bed and mumbled encouraging, mothering type words while I almost fell asleep.  I say almost because he started shouting, 'wake up!' and hitting me with his hammer.  He's my least favorite child.

17.  Until I look at him again.

18.  I don't think I have the patience for chess.  Three quarters of the way through I start intentionally losing just to make the game go faster.

19.  When you hate napping and have eleventy seven things to do, there is nothing worse than laying down with a toddler until he finally drifts off to la-la land.  I swear, I want to jump out of my skin.

20.  I think I may have developed late in life ADD.

21.  Mike calls his own particular case "ADOS".  That stands for Attention Deficit - Oooooo Shiny....!"

22.  I got the last season of Lost on dvd from the library!  This is doubly exciting because it only checks out for one week.  But since I'm out of district my library card for this particular library expires on the 30th.  So I plan on keeping as long as it takes to get through all 16 episodes plus bonus features.  Because what are they gonna do, fine me? 

23.  Right now my brother is saying I make a terrible Christian.

24.  Hush up, Gary, this is my blog.

25.  That's all, folks.  I gotta go make dinner for 10 people.