Monday, October 3, 2011

R.I.P. my jolly old elf

Two days ago came the sudden death of a beloved one in our home.

His death was, as I said, sudden.  
Anna was helping me unpack like the good little slave labor she is.
A few minutes later, she disappeared.
Then, she came back.
Handed me a pile of letters.  Eight years or so of Santa letters.   Unopened.  Suspicious indeed.
Since she had left to go get reinforcements (Cora) I was really up a creek without a paddle.  Or a life jacket.  Or a granola bar.
We had to have The Talk.  Not That Talk.  The Other Talk.
I was sad.
I am still sad.

At least I have Gianni.

Is it wrong to keep having babies just to keep the magic of Santa Claus alive and well in my house?

The girls weren't angry.  Cora actually seemed very nonplussed, but now that she has her own room (Roo and Moose are sharing) she has become very teen-like.  Anna cried a little.  But then I started telling her funny stories about Daddy and I being Santa and how much fun we have and how one year, etc, etc.  Now she's excited to keep it up for the little ones in her life.

Then I stuck my foot farther up my mouth. 

They have never really believed in the Easter Bunny.  I always thought that was a dorky one and I just can't figure out a way not only to make it likable and believable but a way to tie it into Jesus' resurrection.  

So, little kids, after Jesus had been dead for three days, the Easter Bunny rolled away the stone from the tomb!  Jesus climbed on his back and together they hopped through the town leaving chocolate eggs to all the good little boys and girls.  

It doesn't have a good ring to it, never mind that it smacks of sacrilege. 

So, anyhoo, as we were talking of Santa, the subject of the Tooth Fairy came up.  I also think the Tooth Fairy is a bit weird and faintly creepy, but whatever, we've always done it.  Of course I am the world's worst tooth fairy stand-in and the fact that these poor offspring of mine haven't figured out the truth sooner is a miracle since I forget at least 3/4 of the time.  But anyway, Anna said something about the Tooth Fairy and I said something about her not being real of course, but I was so shaken up about the whole Santa thing that I wasn't really thinking straight or listening properly and I THOUGHT we were talking about the Easter Bunny.  Which they already know isn't real.  Not the Tooth Fairy.  Which was what we were really conversing about now.  Which they didn't know wasn't real.

Silence fell as I realized what I had done.

Anna squeaks,
'You mean the Tooth Fairy isn't real EITHER?'

I have to stop blogging now so that I can go buy my traumatized daughters a pony.


  1. deborah, anticoffeedrinkernowOctober 3, 2011 at 12:11 PM

    My kiddos have known for some time and the older ones told the younger ones. Plus they taught them how to get mom and dad to buy them the stuff they want by acting like there was a real whatever. lol. You can still play along for their sake and have fun. they alway get gifts from Santa because Santa is mom and Dad. and We get all the goodies left behind.....:)

  2. I know you know this because you've been reading my blog, but I have MAJOR MOMMY GUILT over the lies about the Tooth Fairy. And I haven't even started on Santa.

    Oh, dear.

  3. JJ,
    I know. It's been a bad year for elves and fairies everywhere. :(

    Just do what Scarlett O'Hara would do, and think about it tomorrow.

  4. I remember telling Channing that Santa wasn't real when she was 3 years old. She didn't want to go to sleep because she was afraid and didn't want a strange man breaking into her house. It didn't matter that he was leaving gifts and not stealing. The next Christmas, she insisted that he was REAL!! Too funny. :)